When two people form a family, they share a state of life.
Jane Austen has a famous saying:
in marriage, it is absurd to think only about family means, but it is foolish not to consider family means.
Love is not marriage. Love is romance, marriage is firewood. Love is the mutual delight of two feelings, and marriage is the connection of two families.
marriage is a matter for two families.
when children are looking for a partner, they must look at each other's family circumstances. Families with these three characteristics must not look for them.
scold father and mother
there is a widely circulated saying: "the attitude towards your parents is your most real character."
"giving priority to filial piety" and being grateful to parents is the most basic conscience.
before you talk about marriage, you should take a look at this person's attitude towards his parents and the way they get along.
if even the closest family members are not loved and cared for, then this person is like a walking corpse and is not worth trusting for life.
I have seen a piece of news before:
in Anhui, there is a son who does everything he can to annoy his old father to death.
he carried a wreath and hung it directly on his father's door;
he sprayed the word "drink" on the door of his parents' house with spray paint;
the old father had no choice but to change the locks. The son, no matter what locks he changed, pried open all the security doors.
do whatever it takes to fear that the old man will not be angry to death.
being good to your parents is not only filial piety and kindness, but also a character of establishing the world and being a human being.
Confucius said that the most difficult part of filial piety is "color difficulty".
it is not difficult for parents to have a carefree diet, but it is difficult not to show face, respect and understanding to their parents.
being kind to your parents is the highest accomplishment of an adult.
Family style is not correct
Mr. Cai Yuanpei wrote a sentence:
"A family is the school at the beginning of life. The character of a lifetime, the so-called constant change, is probably born in the family. "
Family is a person's earliest school. Family style is the starting point of one's values.
Family style is like a foundation.
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good family style, bearing the temperament precipitation handed down from generation to generation, contains inestimable spiritual wealth.
Qiao Zhiyong, a famous Jin businessman, praised the "Heshun family" and believed that the whole family should live in harmony and work together.
Qiao Zhiyong laid down six forbidden family rules and strictly restricted his family members;
he took famous quotes such as "Zhu Zi's Family motto" and carved them in all the rooms of Qiao's compound, so that his children and grandchildren would read aloud face to face, recite silently, and always keep in mind the principle of "harmony is the most precious" in life and work.
the Qiao family is a big family, and dozens of people live together, not without friction.
because they put "everyone" first in everything and do not fight or fight, they are harmonious and stable within.
the business of Qiao's family is becoming more and more popular
Shun, who also holds Ying Baotai in troubled times, has been prosperous for a hundred years.
to judge a family, the first thing to do is to look after the family.
"there is a hundred blessings in Heshun, and everything is prosperous in Heshun." the family style is positive, which is the luck of the children and the way to prosper the family.
if the family style is good, good fortune will come.
only through generations can we prosper forever.
the door is not the right one.
when it comes to marriage, "perfect match" is considered by many to be a pedantic word, but nowadays it more refers to "matching of the three values".
because the two sides of communication have different education, different views on money and different social circles, the three values will be different.
if they don't match, if they get along for a long time, the more contradictions they have, the less common topics they have. In the end, they tend to get tired of each other and drift away from each other.
in the Golden Powder Family, the simple female college students can not bear the romantic offensive of the rich family, regardless of the advice of the people around them
sue, resolutely marry into the Jin family.
soon, Leng Qingqiu, who was used to diligence and thrift, was dissatisfied with Jin Yanxi's lavish spending, but Jin Yanxi laughed at her for being ignorant and did not know how to enjoy.
when they first got married, the Jin family was still very angry and had a lot of money, and everyone was looking for their own pleasures. Later, the Jin family fell, and when Jin Yanxi separated, he only got 10,000 yuan.
the situation changed, but Jin Yanxi still only cared about excessive gambling, soon ran out of money, and stole his wife's jewelry and sold it into gambling money.
Leng Qingqiu tried to persuade him to make progress. However, he said to Leng Qingqiu, "if you spend all your money and everyone goes begging, what does it matter?"
after being extremely disappointed, Leng Qingqiu ran away with his son to fend for himself, and never saw each other again.
as the saying goes:
"not a family, do not enter a door.
two people form a family, not just to get a license, but to share a state of life.
the three values are different, in fact, it is a kind of "wrong door is not the right door".
shoes that do not fit will wear out the skin; the dishes are not to the taste, either tasteless or mixed.
if you are not the same people, then do not force, no matter how to make do, it will not be able to go together after all.
Roman Roland said:
"you don't have to be reluctant to love, but be responsible for marriage."
the former focuses on romance, while the latter focuses on reality.
when the passion fades, what you enter is a flat life of one room, two people, three meals and four seasons, full of small frictions and chicken feathers.
think more about practical problems and put them into practice in order to make love land smoothly in marriage and make the connection between the two families more harmonious.And Mei.